This afternoon I was on an Amtrak Acela express train from NYC to Washington as I will be speaking at a conference tomorrow. I boarded the train and selected one of the four person pod seats with the table. Just before we were about to leave, a group of four people boarded and three sat down in the pod across from me and an older woman sat down in my pod. The weather outside today was near 100F and the train was cool but not cold. After we left NYC, the woman across from me put on a winter coat.

The other three passengers in her group were dressed in business suits and shortly after we left Newark station, the three passengers went to the cafe car. The woman across from me began to make some phone calls and talk about general medications - I assumed from her conversation with the other members in her group that she was in the medical field (but not a medical doctor).

Then, out of the blue, she takes a thermometer out of her bag and puts it into her mouth!!! Imagine this, I am sitting across from this woman watching her take her temperature while wearing a winter coat on the hottest day in years.  She took it out and put it on the table - no napkin, nothing.

Ten minutes later her cell rings and she begins to explain to the person on the other end that she has an infectious disease for the last three weeks and no one has been able to treat it. Mind you, the idea of an infectious disease is horrible and I feel very bad for the woman, but must she use the table where I am sitting and eating lunch as her personal hospital?

I got up and moved to the next car - the food attendant asked me why I was moving so quickly, I explained the situation and she said, "that is so nasty" - the thermometer apparently sat on the table until they reached Philadelphia where the four people exited the train.

I know this story sounds completely bizarre so I took a photo of the woman with the probe in her mouth:

She might win the award for biggest transit douche of 2008!